Day Eighty Six: Now I'm a Doctor

My weight gain has been driving me insane and I blame my psych medications. I decided that I was not going to take them anymore for the past three days. I just went cold turkey and out of my mind at the same time. I ended up having a full on meltdown on 23rd street where I was crying uncontrollably. I totally see the difference on and off my meds, but I still don't want to be on them even though with them I am much more balanced. I was so used to self medicating my mental illness that this new process of working with doctor approved meds feels foreign to me. I have declared myself a doctor since I'm fucking with my prescriptions. I have learned how really off my rocker I can get when I'm not on my medication. I learned that I really need to be on them during this time in my life. I hope that maybe someday I can get off them, but today just isn't that day.